I find that my sexuality is still evolving. I’m realizing that what I was attracted to a few years ago, hell, even a few months ago, isn’t what I’m attracted to today. As I told Eddie earlier, I’m just fussier and fussier each day. And I’m finding new things that turn me on and things that used to don’t excite me as much any more.

I heard from a guy yesterday who clearly states in his personal ad he likes hairy women, especially hairy pits. Guess I’m not that desperate because I blew him off. Why? He’s just looking to get laid. Hell, I could get that any time I wanted it. John is drooling to get into my pants as are a few others. My little fireman is always available. I’m just looking for something very, very different at this stage of life.

I’m not going to settle for less than I deserve, and I guess I’m looking for that instant attraction that I felt with Chuck. I still can remember, 6 months later, sitting in Dunkin Donuts and squirming because I was so turned on from him merely holding my hands and rubbing my fingers. I’d never, ever felt that way before. He definitely struck a chord in me that no one had ever reached.

Right now I’m really busy with work and thinking about getting my cars on the road. Going to visit the Firebird this week but I think it’s going in for the exhaust pipe, and I want to call about my other car. I know that it’s 96% done and I want it back before April 1st or it goes to another garage.

Saw a few awesome cars on Friday and wished I had a classic to drive around. Saw 2 Novas, both 1969 I think, one orange and black and the other solid blue. Saw a few other 40’s cars as well.

Got Hair To Stay updated on Friday and also updated Hairy Pictures with lots of new links. Got my newest site done but have more work to do on it later tonight. No, it’s not porn or adult but is something I can update once in a while. This was the idea I got from the phone call while my car was being serviced!

Have about 45 sites to update, a huge project I’m going to begin tomorrow. The sites are up, just redoing them, and will mention it here when done.

Finally finished up the hairy Asian women site last night.

Then, I began upgrading certain software used on more than 100 sites, including this one. PHEW. Only one broken site after all of that, and I’m about to try to fix it. Found a bunch of sites I’d forgotten about and hadn’t updated in over a year. Guess I have a lot more work to do this year than I thought.

WICKED frisky! Yesterday I was climbing the walls and last night took care of it several times. Not sure why but am glad, it feels awesome

Reading a personal ad today of a guy who wasn’t that bad looking at all!

I’ll show you how a real bad boy, ……. can be a real good man.

Damn, that went right to the groin! He’s within 40 minutes of me but I’m not his type, but hoo doggie did that give me fantasies!

Yesterday I ran into a guy I met 3 years ago from a dating site. Really nice guy, my height through — with a wife — but we got along well. We talk every 6 months or so and always say we need to get together for coffee again, but we’re both so busy.

He didn’t say hi! Last time I saw him I had longer, curly, blondish/brown hair and now I have the short/straight/red hair, so he only glanced over me without realizing it was me. I emailed and yelled at him! He’s still really, REALLY cute and a real temptation. So, maybe we can hookup for coffee in the next few weeks.

I’ve given up on imma be all ova u. While he would be great in fantasy, the reality is he’s too young and seemingly only wants one type of relationship, if that. He hasn’t messaged me at all but has been around, and I figure if he wants to meet me that badly, he’d message me. I’ve never, ever approached him on AIM so he should know I’m too shy to approach some guy. Oh well.

I’m just going to hold out until I find that guy that instinctively tells me he won’t be a selfish lover like all the rest.

Life has been hectic. Let’s see. First — MEN. This guy I met 3 years ago is interested again. I met him right before I met my ex and while he was a nice guy, he treated me pretty badly and admitted he was a jerk and apologized. He’s been sniffing around for a while now just making chit-chat and yesterday he dropped the bomb

Can I ask for a second chance? I know it’s not the best of circumstances but it is better than nothing. We do get along well and have many of the same interests. I can make it down you way more often. I really enjoyed the day we spent together. Let’s try, please. Plus you do kiss rather well and I find you very sexy.

While it’s flattering, I said no. I told him I want more than a fuck buddy and want much, much more and refuse to settle for less. I also told him he treated me like shit last time and I don’t wish to repeat that.

Then “imma be all ova u” is back. I accidentally opened AIM without realizing it, and he came on and said hi. I was pressed for time but said hi back, and after a bit of chatting he said he wanted to meet. Long story short I told him as soon as I have a free afternoon I’ll message him. Just coffee, but there may be more eventually. He is into fat women, loves hairy women, is very local, and we’ll see what happens.

Dad is still hospitalized. He had another transfusion last night, but his last major hospitalization he had 25 pints of blood in total, so 2 this time is nothing. He’s supposedly being released on Friday to go to a rehab facilility for a few weeks, since he can’t walk and is so unsteady. Once that happens my time will free up a bit more and I’ll be less stressed.

The BBW site I put up is beginning to get some steady visitors. The hairy BBW site will be out next week, then a hairy lesbian site …. then another one giving you weird news and interesting links. That’s just an old site I plan to resurrect.

VERY weird dream the other night, of all people — NICK. We were kissing and kissing and he was an amazing kisser. Funny how I dreamed of him since I told him to fuck off last week. But he brought back memories of Chuck, the guy I met this summer who was a good kisser. It’s strange, but I generally don’t like strangers touching me, let alone kissing me, but having spent all that time with him it just felt right, plus he turned me on, the first guy to do that in a dozen years or more, and that was just by holding my hands and fondling my fingers.

Been getting up early for work and working late into the night, straight out — I’m literally working on 6 sites at a time right now!

Let’s see — I finished up Hair To Stay Erotica, Hair To Stay Sex Toys and am working on the fat women sites. I also updated the BBWs On Webcam site. I put up the wrong full-page ad and if you tried to join, it cost money and it should have been a FREE signup! So, now you can join for free. Sorry ’bout that.

I also completed the Hair To Stay Movies site which simply lists all the movies I’ve done to date. Still have another … 5 or 6 sites to finish off before updating a ton of others. All this work has my neck hurting and I’m totally stressed out. My hormones are raging, too! I plan to take a break in a bit and take care of me!

New guy, sort of .. he’s not local, he’s waaaaaaaaay far away. At first I thought he was interested, then I felt he backed away, but now I’m just not sure. He’s not my type since I like rough, scruffy bad boys, but he does have a mustache/goatee but the biggest thing is he’s very intelligent. I truly look forward to his emails that are properly formed and don’t resemble an AOL teen chat room (”how r u? wot u doin? u doin k? dats good me 2″). I am not really into looks so his lack of bad boy behavior is fine with me as he’s such a sweet, romantic guy. Oh, dig this — he LOVES fat, hairy women …! So, we’ll see what happens.

Imma be all ova u hasn’t been around but that’s my fault for not opening up AIM all week. I just got tired of all the HNG (horny net geeks) who would message me out of the blue.

I’m working on a site now and don’t want to give away any hints on it, so I’ll surprise everyone when it’s done.

First, I went to the auto parts store and the guy offered to change my points for me. As he was doing it, this stud in a huge black truck came up and he had a gorgeous goatee. He helped the guy gap the points and we talked about cars. He had a nice dog, too!

Then I went to meet the guy who will be pulling my engine and painting it, and he had a goatee. And, out comes his worker who has a goatee, too. THEN they bring me to their garage to show me his 1972 SS, 1970 Nova, and other cars he’s working on including a 1966 GTO, 1968 Road Runner, and a few other cars. I was in heaven, let me tell you. THEN he says he has another storage area with GM parts — a 3,200 sq. foot “barn” with nothing but original parts. Shelf after shelf of original boxes of stuff for my car, but I really don’t need to replace much, since this car is in awesome shape.

Yesterday I went to see the electrical guy since the wiring on my car was in sad shape I thought. HE had a sexy goatee, too!!! He said it’s all original wiring and really in great shape. He did replace 2 wires (I’d already replaced my frayed coil wire), hooked up the heater/defroster (don’t ask why the moron previous owner disconnected it, I haven’t a clue) and fixed my other issue it seems. All I can say is WOW. This car does nothing but attract guys with goatees!!! Should have seen the guy with the George Michael look at another auto parts store yesterday when I went in with the kid. He BEGGED me to drive car, then mentions that his father has a Camaro and he’s not allowed to drive it since he wrapped his friend’s Iroq around a tree. Meanwhile, begging to drive mine?? LOL I don’t think so!!!!!!!!

Was about to go to bed and then the Red Sox scored 5 runs so now I’m glued to the television.

Nick is such a chicken shit piece of crap. There, I said it. Ignores me for 2 weeks, then apparently he accidentally messaged me with “hi” on AIM. I came back to that computer, saw the message, wanted to tell him to go fuck himself, but instead said, “uhm hi” and the second I sent it, he logged off– he must have realized he messaged me and ran like a little girl when I responded. He’s not a real man and now I see why he can’t find anyone to love him. He’s a game player for sure.

Another guy who was interested in me disappeared but hadn’t been on line in a month, but today I noticed he had logged in, yet didn’t message me. It’s ok, I found his profile on a LOT of dating sites recently and now realize he’s definitely not what I’m looking for, particularly since (a) he’s not into cars, (b) he has a very young child and (c) lives over an hour from me.

Uploaded more pics of the car this morning, since I document every little thing. Shoot, I replaced 4 screws in my grillwork yesterday and took pictures!!

Saw an interesting series of posts on a forum where virtually everyone there claims NO man is attracted to overweight women and NO man would ever want a woman with hairy legs, full bush, hairy pits or a mustache. Wow, how wrong they are

About 6 weeks ago I wrote about meeting that 19-year old kid from MySpace. He never contacted me after we met, which was fine with me as I didn’t want to hook up with him, which I told him even though he begged me for 20 minutes. Yesterday I was driving and realized I went by his house, so when I got home, dropped him a note saying “I drove by your house and saw your truck, maybe I should have beeped and said hi.”

I get back a response, “HEY I WAS GONNA BUT THEN IT HITT ME IM TOO YOUNG FOR YOU LATER”

He needs to get over himself!! I told him from the first email I wasn’t interested in him sexually. I told him that when we met. I told him that when he begged for 20 minutes on the phone. Yet a simple “hi” email trigger the above response? LOL. I blew HIM off so I guess to save face he’s implying I’m too old for him, which is fine ….

He’s immature, too young for me, into drugs and alcohol — exactly opposite of what I want.

But I laughed my ass off, that’s for sure

I’ve been talking with someone for a bit and last night he got a piece of my heart. How? Well, we were chatting and I mentioned I needed a vacation and suggested he take one as well, up to this area for a few days, then we could go away and get to know each other better. He responded and mentioned “a little place for us with a fireplace where we can cuddle.” That was it right there and then. No man has ever tapped into the deeply romantic side I have or done anything about it.

The insecure side of me hopes I don’t fuck this up. The romantic side of me hopes it works out.

I’m trying to keep it all in stride as we never did get to plan a vacation or set a date. I need some advance notice so I can make plans and cancel anything that needs cancelling (hair, nails, laser).

So, we’ll see what happens.

I was reading a book as usual (a romance, of course) and it was the story of a woman who was raped and how she met someone who interested her after her marriage ended. Her marriage wasn’t good and the sex wasn’t either, but with this new guy she had feelings — and she said “I have feelings … down there … that I’ve never had and it scares me and excites me.”

All I could think of was that was what I wanted. When I met that football player in August, I had those feelings and all he did was hold my hands and fondle my fingers. But I was squirming from it. Before that, I hadn’t had those types of feelings in too many years to count. And, I realized when I say I wanted a connection with someone, it was those feelings down there that I wanted. When I say I felt no connection, I guess I’m saying he didn’t give me feelings down there.

I hate meeting new people because I absolutely beat the hell out of myself after I do. If he likes me, I wonder why. If he says I’m wonderful, it brings back painful memories of my last relationship. He said I was wonderful and amazing and when he ended it, I asked what happened to his thinking I was so wonderful and amazing and he said, “I got to know you better.” That beat the hell out of my self-esteem and ego and it took me a long time to recover. I did, and was doing better, but then I got into a rut and can’t seem to get out of it. I have a mirror and know what I look like and harbor no illusions about having looks, so when a guy says I’m attractive, I wonder why he’s lying to me. Godnose he’s not after my wonderful body.

Then there is this guy I’ve clicked with sexually online. We talk about other things but he said something to me a few weeks ago and since then I’ve been pretty frisky and can’t stop thinking about it/him. Unfortunately we’ll never meet, and even if we did, I don’t think an old fat chick is what he wants anyway.

It seems when I find someone I want, I can’t have them, and those I don’t want always want me.

Then there is the whole hair thing. Let’s face it, most guys aren’t into hairy women. Those that are generally like hair in one area, maybe they’ll like hairy pits, but anything else isn’t a turn-on to them. I get tired of fighting to be who I am, ya know?

Oh well, Shrek is on tonight and I definitely need a really, really good cry.

1) NOT KISSING FIRST.
Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you’re paying by the hour and trying to get your money’s worth by cutting out non essentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay.

2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR.
Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there’s a
difference between being erotic and blowing as if you’re trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts.

3) NOT SHAVING.
You often forget you have a porcupine strapped to your chin which you rake repeatedly across your partner’s face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it’s not passion, it’s avoidance.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.
Most men act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and smooth them.

5) BITING HER NIPPLES.
Why do men fasten onto a woman’s nipples, then clamp down like they’re trying to deflate her body via her breasts? Nipples are highly sensitive. They can’t stand up to chewing. Lick and suck them gently. Flicking your tongue across them is good. Pretending they’re a dogie toy isn’t.

6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES.
Stop doing that thing where you twiddle the nipples between finger and thumb like you’re trying to find a radio station in a hilly area. Focus on the whole breasts, not just the exclamation points.

7) IGNORING THE OTHER PARTS OF HER BODY.
A woman is not a highway with just three turnoffs: Breastville East and West, and the Midtown Tunnel. There are vast areas of her body which you’ve ignored far too often as you go bombing straight into downtown Vagina. So start paying them some attention.

GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED.
Poor manual dexterity in the underskirt region can result in tangled fingers and underpants. If you’re going to be that aggressive, just ask her to take the damn things off.

9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT.
Condom disposal is the man’s responsibility. You wore it, you store it.

10) ATTACKING THE CLITORIS.
Direct pressure is very unpleasant, so gently rotate your fingers along side of the clitoris.

11) STOPPING FOR A BREAK.
Women, unlike men, don’t pick up where they left off. If you stop, they
plummet back to square one very fast. If you can tell she’s not there, keep
going at all costs, numb jaw or not.

12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY.
Women hate looking stupid, but stupid she will look when naked at the
waist with a sweater stuck over her head. Unwrap her like an elegant present,
not a kid’s toy.

13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY.
Stroking her gently through her panties can be very sexy. Pulling the
material up between her thighs and yanking it back and forth is not.

14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA.
Although most men can find the clitoris without maps, they still believe
that the vagina is where it’s all at. No sooner is your hand down there than
you’re trying to stuff stolen banknotes up a chimney. This is okay in
principle, but if you’re not careful, it can hurt - so don’t get carried
away. It’s best to pay more attention to her clitoris and the exterior of her
vagina at first, then gently slip a finger inside her and see if she likes
it.

15) MASSAGING TOO ROUGHLY.
You’re attempting to give her a sensual, relaxing massage to get her in
the mood. Hands and fingertips are okay; elbows and knees are not.

16) UNDRESSING PREMATURELY.
Don’t force the issue by stripping before she’s at least made some move
toward getting your stuff off, even if it’s just undoing a couple of buttons.

17) TAKING YOUR PANTS OFF FIRST.
A man in socks and underpants is a at his worst. Lose the socks fist.

18) GOING TOO FAST.
When you get to the penis-in-vagina situation, the worst thing you can do
is pump away like an industrial power tool - she’ll soon feel like an
assembly-line worker made obsolete by your technology. Build up slowly, with
clean, straight, regular thrusts.

19) GOING TOO HARD.
If you bash your great triangular hip bones into her thigh or stomach, the
pain is equal to two weeks of horseback riding concentrated into a few
seconds.

20) COMING TOO SOON.
Every man’s fear. With reason. If you shoot before you see the whites of
her eyes, make sure you have a backup plan to ensure her pleasure too.

21) NOT COMING SOON ENOUGH.
It may appear to you that humping for an hour without climaxing is the
mark of a sex god, but to her it’s more likely the mark of a numb vagina. At
least buy some intriguing wall hangings, so she has something to hold her
interest while you’re playing Marathon Man.

22) ASKING IF SHE HAS COME.
You really ought to be able to tell. Most women make noise. But if you
really don’t know, don’t ask

23) PERFORMING ORAL SEX TOO GENTLY.
Don’t act like a giant cat at a saucer of milk. Get your whole mouth down
there, and concentrate on gently rotating or flicking your tongue on her
clitoris.

24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN.
Men persist in doing this until she’s eyeball-to-penis, hoping that it
will lead very swiftly to mouth-to-penis. All women hate this. It’s about
three steps from being dragged to a cave by their hair. If you want her to
use her mouth, use yours; try talking seductively to her.

25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX.
Sperm tastes like sea water mixed with egg white. Not everybody likes it.
When she’s performing oral sex, warn her before you come so she can do what’s
necessary.

26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO.
Don’t thrust. She’ll do all the moving during fellatio. You just lie
there. And don’t grab her head.

27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES.
In X-rated movies, women seem to love it when men ejaculate over them. In
real life, it just means more laundry to do.

28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES.
Asking her to be on top is fine. Lying there grunting while she does all
the hard work is not. Caress her gently, so that she doesn’t feel quite so
much like the captain of a schooner. And let her have a rest.

29) ATTEMPTING ANAL SEX AND PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
This is how men earn a reputation for not being able to follow directions.
If you want to put it there, ask her first. And don’t think that being drunk
is an excuse.

30) TAKING PICTURES.
When a man says, “Can I take a photo of you?” she’ll hear the words “__to
show my buddies.” At least let her have custody of them.

31) NOT BEING IMAGINATIVE ENOUGH.
Imagination is anything from drawing patterns on her back to pouring honey
on her and licking it off. Fruit, vegetables, ice and feathers are all handy
props; hot candle wax and permanent dye are a no no.

32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS.
There is no less erotic noise. It’s as sexy as a belching contest.

33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES.
If she wants to do advanced yoga in bed, fine, but unless she’s a Romanian
gymnast, don’t get too ambitious. Ask yourself if you want a sexual partner
with snapped hamstrings.

34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
Read this carefully: Anal stimulation feels good for men because they have
a prostate. Women don’t.

35) GIVING LOVE BITES.
It is highly erotic to exert some gentle suction on the sides of the neck,
if you do it carefully. No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty
scarves for weeks on end.

36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS.
Don’t shout encouragement like a coach with a megaphone. It’s not a big
turn-on.

37) TALKING DIRTY.
It makes you sound like a lonely magazine editor calling a 1-900 line. If
she likes nasty talk, she’ll let you know

38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES.
You have to finish the job. Keep on trying until you get it right, and she
might even do the same for you.

39) SQUASHING HER.
Men generally weigh more than women, so if you lie on her a bit too
heavily, she will turn blue.

40) THANKING HER.
Never thank a woman for having sex with you. Your bedroom is not a soup
kitchen.

A month ago I met that guy who thought he was SO hot. I told him and told him I felt no connection. Today he messaged me to ask if I wanted to “hang out” so I asked what he meant and he said he wanted to get together and play. Ick. Then he tells me he’s “very hot, horny and well hung.” Go away! I told him that I really REALLY wasn’t interested and he was sort of begging and I told him he must be desperate. He said no, he just wanted me. Yeah, right. He finally did get the hint, wished me luck, and signed off.

Why do those I want not want me, and those I don’t want always want me? Sometimes I think I’m asking for too much and other times I think I’m not asking for enough. I just know what I want and won’t settle for less this time. I’m getting more and more frustrated with men and I hope I don’t insult anyone who reads this, but all I’m finding are game players, guys who only want to get laid, married guys, and guys who thrill to the chase and run. I mean, over the past several weeks I’ve talked to several guys who all seemed interested in me after talking for a while, yet as soon as it’s time to call me (I offer my number) they run. The guy up near Boston, the one 2 towns over (who keeps looking at my profile on a dating site) .. I just don’t get it. Why spend time talking to a woman and talk about meeting her if you never plan to do so? And they say women play games?? I think the former was upset as I’d not drive up to his area to meet him or meet him halfway, but I won’t meet anyone outside of my comfort zone and I know my limitations when it comes to driving distance. The latter wanted to go to dinner and I only offered to meet him for coffee.

Having food at a first meeting is the worst thing you can do in my opinion. You’re supposed to be talking and meeting each other, and shoveling food into your mouth is not condusive with talking a lot.

I’ll be meeting someone on Saturday. We “met” on a dating site and then he ventured over to Hairy Chat. I’m looking foward to meeting him but am very very nervous about it … meeting hair lovers is not my favorite thing to do (sorry, just being honest). He’s into classic cars so we’ll have a lot to talk about.

If I can get to all I need to do this weekend (or at least Sunday) I’ll have some new sites to tell you about and some updates to my own sites.

Life can be confusing at times, huh? For me, sex and love go together. I can’t have sex without love or at least deep feelings toward someone. So now I have this chance to be with someone who seemingly wants me. We haven’t met in person, we’ve just emailed and talked on the phone. He’s young enough that it would curl your hair if I told you his age … but he likes hairy women. He likes all women, actually, because he’s at that age that sex is meaningless and he just wants a warm hole for a while. I’m not stupid

Now … he does turn me on but … do I really want to have some anonymous sex just to have sex? Will I be able to face myself in the mirror the next day?

Having written it down, I’ve made my decision … I can’t do it. It’s just not me and will leave me empty. I’ll meet him for coffee but that’s it.

There is someone else who likes hairy women but he’s about an hour or so away, and I know that never works out, so am hesitant. He’s also not into a lot of the things I’m into, but I think I could get around that. Not sure if he’s into fat chicks as we haven’t talked that far into things. At least with him I won’t be told I’m disgusting for not shaving my pits or anything else.

Busy day without enough hours in the day to do all I wanted to do. Hopefully tonight I can get some stuff out of the way that needs to be out of the way finally.

40 degrees at night, meaning I wake up like a Pammie popsicle. I’m up around 3 every night and by 6 like to take a nap, but it’s just too cold in the living room to nap. Today I have to be up, err, out very early so don’t want to chance a nap in bed.

An issue with not sleeping much means I’m up working more, and thinking more. Lots going on in my head, lots I don’t want to talk about, but suffice to say I’m just in a punk mood. I also need a vacation pretty badly as I’m majorly stressed from so many different things.

I did get rid of one source of stress yesterday by shutting down one of my forums. Too many people acting like children.

Heard from the guy I met last week, or the week before. I’ve told him now 3 times I “felt no connection” but he still insists he wants to hook up and have sex. Yeah, right. How do I say “you did not turn me on” without being rude? Sheesh. He did nothing for me, his personality was boring and he just wasn’t my type.

Then again, only one man in my life has ever turned me on upon meeting. He was the man of my fantasies right in front of me. Part of me kicks myself for not exploring more with him. It was the first time in my life someone turned me on with simple touches like holding my hands and stroking my fingers. And, he was such a good kisser I kept thinking about how much more pleasure his mouth could give me. I guess if he turned out to be a good guy it would have worked out, but he had to lie and play games.

Spent a lot of time with “the kid” recently and it’s kicking me in the ass as I’m realizing I’m in such a quandry. While I’m physically attracted to younger guys like him, I just can’t deal with some of the immaturity. He’s a mature kid but still … Emotionally I’m attracted to older men and that fact was proven to me even more in the past month. Sometimes I wonder if I know what the hell I want.

Last night I actually slept, first time I slept past 3 am all week. That little pill works wonders. I’ll nap later, though, as I still feel like I need more sleep.

Heard from Jamie and he says he wants to meet, so that’s a good thing. Bruno (the 23-year old) also hinted he wanted to meet, but keeps saying how much I turn him on. Wait until he sees me in person!! He’ll never think of me and be turned on again

The hot cop is still around and I’ll probably talk to him on the phone this weekend. He definitely turns me on but I’m so far out of his league it isn’t funny.

Went to a local car show last night and met up with Chip, though I didn’t stay very late. It was really chilly on the ocean with 20-30 MPH winds, then all of a sudden it got REALLY humid, the kind that makes your hair curl, your scalp crawl and your clothes feel gummy on you. Most of the cars were from the 20’s to 50’s with just a couple of 60’s cars. The only muscle-type car was a Mustang California Special and not a single Firebird.

Tons of websites to update this weekend and will post once they’re updated.

Hairy Space is finally launched officially. People can now comment on blogs, edit their blogs and all photos are the correct size, plus I put in some security things so I can block people from viewing things I don’t want them to see! Have a new ad campaign running and will really begin to push it next week. So far a few couples have met from the site which makes me feel great.

Made a few new friends on one dating site this week. Most are into classic cars and one is into hairy women as well as BBWs, and you know how much I love guys who are into both. I’ll be meeting him at the end of the month for at least coffee.

Heard from the moron I met this week but only “hi” type messages as I haven’t been around to respond to him. I wish people would understand that I can’t sit on an instant messenger during the day to chit chat. I work at home but I W O R K … people don’t seem to understand that.

I know you guys love hairy women. Otherwise, you’d not be here unless you’re a fan of my stellar writing skills *snicker*

Let me tell you a little story. On a regular personals ad site — not a sex site — I have an ad where I mention in passing that I am hairy. It’s a small line in a huge ad. One man found it and emailed me, asking if I were really hairy and natural, and I wrote back yes, I was. He then emailed so say how much he liked it and I basically said that it’s nice to hear someone likes hairy women.

The last email asked how long the hair was, where is the hair, what do I shave, blah blah blah.

Now, I understand that very hairy women aren’t that common so he was excited, but … I wrote back and told him I wasn’t interested in a hair fetishist as I was a whole lot more than my hair, and I wanted someone who wanted me and the hair was a bonus. He got the hint and didn’t write back.

Now, he treated me like a hair follicle. Not once did he ask anything about ME. It was simply all about the hair, and I don’t want to deal with that. Sure, you can ask those questions AFTER you get to know me.

So guys, if you correspond with a woman though a personal ads site, or a site like Hairy Space, please remember that first and foremost we are women and aren’t simply hair for you.

I felt bad, because he lived about an hour away, but if he were really interested in me and not just the hair, he would have written back, apologized and explained that he got excited, etc. Instead, he slunk away with his tail between his legs.

The men on that site seem to be liars, game players, and basically full of crap, like on every other dating site. There is one guy, Dave, who I “may” meet for coffee this week, but I’m not sure …. not sure I want to meet someone who has no vehicle and no job.

Been so busy with work lately that it’s hard to get everything done. I did some major changes to Pam’s Reviews that you’ll notice soon. I have to manually change more than 1,000 reviews by hand, so it won’t be done in a day or two! I’m also having Hairy Space upgraded tonight or tomorrow and if all goes well, you’ll notice major changes. I’ll have a lot of script changes and design work to do after that.

Not much new on the male front. The one I want is too far away and the ones who want me are too close. I’m getting tired of hearing from guys who just want to get laid. Yeah, I’d like to have good sex for once in my life, but I’m not going to compromise my principles to have it. And if I never have it, it’s ok, as I do pretty well by myself.

Went to a car show this past weekend and met up with some friends and had a good time. Saw some new cars I’d never seen in person including a Charger and a Road Runner. A friend who is into Chevelle’s (her nickname is Chevelle) and her very, very sexy husband showed up and there were 4 Chevelle’s for them to drool over including a 1963 model. Her husband is probably the only male I have ever, ever met in my life who actually looks you in the eye when talking to you and doesn’t judge you on looks.

I saw a weird hot rod Mustang that was just too restomodded for me. Then some guy came over to talk to us, gave us the creeps, then came over again, and horribly insulted me. I laughed it off but on the way home was in tears. It reminded me of the time I was at a Chinese restaurant and for some reason, one waitress did not like me (she’d always gotten a big tip). When I walked in with my boyfriend, she commented to the other waitress (who told me all of this), “here comes fatso.” My boyfriend at the time laughed and thought it was funny. I cried myself to sleep that night.

Anyway, tonight begins the top 20 on So You Think You Can Dance. I haven’t seen anyone who made me gasp yet but maybe tonight when I get to see more of them. Last year Benjy blew me away (and this year his sister is in the top 20).

While it’s not a hairy bush, I leave you with a favorite pic of mine as of today

Right now I’m watching the auditions for So You Think You Can Dance and I have to admit that the B-Boys are some of my favorite dancers. So inventive and original!

Updated lots of sites recently including the Natural Women Blog and, of course, Hairy Space is continuing to grow and I expect a major update in the next few days.

Warm weather is here so tons of classic car sightings. Saw a 1966 Chevelle numbers-matching, big block fuely for $85k (I don’t think so), tons of Dodge Darts, Camaros, Firebirds, even a Super Bee on the highway. I’m still dealing with my carb issue but it will be resolved in a few weeks. No clue on the pre-bent gas lines but I need to stop in and get really bitchy with them.

Frisky frisky frisky. Ok, damned horny. Been that way for a few days. Today was an unbelievable day. If you’ve been to the Hairy Chat board lately and read some of the newest sex stories, including Up Against The Wall, you’ll know why. That and some good goatees sightings, damn. Just thinking about that story gets my juices flowing again. Damn.

Nothing new on the men front … had a few good prospects but I don’t know, I just don’t seem as interested as I once was. One guy seemed nice but he left me cold. Another seemed promising but didn’t seem to want to get to know ME that well. When I said I wouldn’t meet another the next day for coffee (hey, I’m cautious, shoot me) he blew me off. I’m finding that guys 28-33 are attracting me more and more and it’s bothering me more and more as well. Physically that is what attracts me, yet emotionally I need someone my age or older, particularly a daddy type.

YankBird seems to be MIA so I don’t know why she hasn’t been posting.

I find that I have such different levels of attraction to the opposite sex. Physically I’m attracted to one type, and emotionally to another.

Physically, I notice guys 24-30, goatees and mustache, dark hair, jeans and a baseball cap. I don’t know why but there is something incredibly attractive about that look to me. Yep, it turns me on.

Emotionally, I am attracted to older men with looks not mattering at all, but their mind and “been there done that” attitude.

So, where does that leave guys 30-45? Heh. I guess it all depends on the person, but there isn’t such a strong physical attraction but it can be strong once I get to know them.

I spoke to a guy this week who was all of 23 and you can tell he’s full of himself. Thinks he has the Dick Of Death (I’ve seen a photo; he doesn’t), thinks he’s all that and a big bag of chips. He’s really sexy but he’s not Brad Pitt. He tells me this week I need to shave my underarms, bush and legs because HE does not like it. The chances of he and I meeting are zero to none and the chances of he and I hooking up are even less, yet he feels the need at all of 23 to tell me to change my entire being. Goes on about how men are, blah blah blah. Yeah, he can speak for HIS friends at HIS age, but not all men.

On the other age of the spectrum I spoke to someone age 23 who was totally opposite. He was very respectful of women, something the other definitely isn’t. Told me he’d love me just as I am and, “and again any man would be lucky to call you his companion.” His mother obviously raised him right. He isn’t so shallow that he’d let something like a tuft of underarm hair turn him away from someone of the opposite sex.

Recently I spoke to a man who lives within an hour of me and is a bit older than me. We share a love of classic cars which is attractive in itself. I’ve never seen his photo (face or body parts) and it won’t matter, as the person turns me on. It’s his mind. Older men, for the most part, think quite different when it comes to sex. Young guys want to fuck and brag about it. Older men want to make love and please you.

As my older friend said, your pleasure is my limit. As my younger friend said, I want to fuck you and cum.

Now, which is more attractive?

Yes, I am, still so damned frisky. This new guy surely put some ideas into my head, though he’s really backed off since finding out I was hairy. It’s ok, I understand, but I still think of him and all we’ve talked about.

American Idol and The Shield tonight and then hopefully a really good night sleep as I haven’t slept well in a few nights, mostly due to the storms we’re still having. Dad is still in the hospital today with his transfusion so that’s on my mind as well.

Saw a woman in a store today with a lot of facial hair, she was probably in her early 20’s and really cute. I was so tempted to approach her to model …

I’ve been this way all weekend. It began with something someone said to me, then I read a few stories that really had me going and now, well, I’m still very, very frisky. It’s funny, but as I get older and explore my sexuality, I find myself wanting different things. I’ve never had the greatest sex life and know in my next relationship — if there is one — it has to be awesome or else it won’t last. I had someone interested in me last week but I wasn’t interested in him as he wasn’t dominant. Now, I know that may sound superficial at the outset, but there were other reasons as well, and I could have overlooked some things but not everything. I know what I want, I know how I want it, and I’m not going to settle for less.

I added the new PHOTO OF THE DAY feature to the blog. You’ll see a new photo each day in the right hand sidebar. That is, if all goes well! The script does work since the photo is visible, but we’ll see if the photo changes as it’s supposed to.

I updated the Hairy Guide today as well as some other sites, and redid the fetishes website. Am waiting for a new header graphic but still released it.

Let me ask you guys and girls something — would you rather have bad sex or no sex at all? For me, I’d rather not have to go through the motions and would rather just do myself. I’ve had bad sex, and all the communication in the world doesn’t work if the other person does not listen to what you’re saying. I began to think it was me, but then I’d remember how I can get myself off so quickly, so nothing is wrong with me!

I love masturbating. I admit it. I prefer using my own fingers to toys, because with toys I tend to get off much faster, and generally I like to take my time and prolong it for as long as I can. I like to get close, then back away and touch another area before going back to the good places. My imagination is the greatest toy I can use. I think of things I’d be too embarassed to talk about here, but they get me off.

I could never have anonymous sex, or sex with someone who didn’t know me extremely well, and that’s because I’m not like anyone else. What turns me on AND gets me off is not what does the same for other women. You need to know me very well to know what makes me tick. You have to take the time to get to know me and not be selfish. Yeah, selfish. See, if you only care about your own orgasm and not mine, then you won’t care how you get me off, or even if you do.

What gets me off? Heh, well, I can’t give away my secrets, but here is a small hint — dirty talk. Yep, dirty talk turns me on. But, not all dirty talk, and some words offend me! See why I say you have to get to know me before it can happen?!

Words get me off. When I want to masturbate, 80% of the time I’ll find a story site online (I have a few I visit) or will pick up a book (you know those dirty paperback pocket books) and use it. Pictures don’t really do much for me. Oh sure, they excite me but not enough for anything to happen. Videos on subjects that turn me on will do it for me, but I spend a lot of time on fast forward to go through the boring stuff. Books are just a faster way and they also let my mind and imagination wander until I put myself in the same scenario.

Do you ever think of things you can’t vocalize to others, and things you know you’d never do in reality, but thinking of them gets you excited? You know, those taboo things that most people would think are icky, and in general you agree with them, but in private you masturbate to them?

My sexuality is always evolving. I find new things that excite me and love discovering new places on my body to touch.

Yes, I do. I’ve decided that the next man in my life MUST be a neck nibbler. I’ve never dated anyone who did this. I want you to stand behind me, beside me, in front of me and kiss and nibble my neck, only if you have a mustache, beard and/or goatee. THIS is the way to turn me on, fellas.

I find as I age, I evolve sexually. Something I enjoyed doing, or wanted to do, even 6 months ago, could have changed. I find my mind expanding, my limits expanding, and my interests expanding. Of course, much of this is speculation on my part since there is no man in my life and some days I wonder if there ever will be, and some days I hope there never is!

I do know, however, what turns me on, and I like expanding on those thoughts and feelings and fantasies.

I’ve decided I’m not going to settle for less than I want, or deserve. Rather than having a slice of pie, I need the entire pie.

Today was a good day, though I don’t know how a good day can begin by going to the doctor. 6 month checkup, all is fine and I’m glad it’s out of the way. Had to go out of town for a bit, then rush back for an appointment so today I felt rushed. Now I’m able to sit down and relax a little.

Do you get turned on by certain words, phrases or sayings? I do, and it affects me when I least expect it. I had posted on a forum that I froze last night since it was so cold, and someone simply said, “do you want my goatee to snuggle with you?” and damn if it didn’t turn me on. Now, granted, this guy IS sexy, and has a goatee, and he’s really a lot of fun to flirt with, but his words just went right to the groin. He just trips my trigger. I can’t even explain how it happens, just certain things will make me say “oooh” and my body says it, too, and then for the rest of the day I think about what was said and it makes me frisky. I then create an entire fantasy around that and take care of things at night.

I’ve always been that way. Someone will say something and it just goes right to the groin. I’m more verbally stimulated but have never dated anyone who would pick up on that and run with it, so to speak, despite my telling them this turned me on. I think I’d rather you turn me on verbally than stroke my kitty … it’s like the verbal gets me wet and THEN I’d want you to stroke my kitty. I definitely need to be warmed up, and verbal does it for me.

So, any potential boyfriends take notes, ok?! Seriously, though, I know guys are verbally stimulated …. face it, if I was cuddling up to you and said, “I’d love to lick your cock right now” it would cause a little hitch down below, right? That’s it. RIGHT TO THE GROIN!!!

Any of you like this, or am I just the odd duck out here?

Hurricane Ernesto is hitting right now, but so far it’s just very windy with some rain, but they say more rain and wind tomorrow. My leak is just worsening but Monday night supposedly my contractor is coming in to fix it. He’s “very busy” but hey, my stuff needs to get done, ya know? That reminds me that I need to take some pics of my remodeled room for Eddie — tomorrow for sure!

Went to Connecticut today but didn’t buy the truck. Not only was it a manual (and yes, I know it’s not expensive to do a changeover to automatic) but the engine was really tired, you could just hear it. He had a really nice 1969 Firebird there for about $7k on a divorce sale, but I don’t want a Firebird. I’m still learning about Pontiacs and I don’t want a muscle car now, if ever. He also had a 1965 Mustang in bright blue for a really good price but the guy with me was an expert in trucks, not Mustangs, so I didn’t even consider it. I’m also skeptical when someone wants to sell a car worth $14k for less than half that amount …. I’ll keep looking for my truck though. We did have a really nice lunch and it was nice to go out with a guy who had manners and didn’t bitch about every little thing during the meal. Saw gas as low as $2.42 at one station but very few classic car sightings due to the storm. I did learn some more about engines today. I always figured, for example, a 389 was a 389. But, no, not all have the same horsepower. I need to get a book on engines to learn more.

Still frisky as hell! In fact, I had such an erotic dream last night I got up around 2 am and was so disoriented with passion I thought I wasn’t alone. Pretty frisky today, though we didn’t talk about sex all that much. I’m not quite sure what set me off other than hormones, it’s not like I had some great goatee sightings this week! In fact, it’s been a while since I had a really good one .. sighting, that is!

Just realized that Friday night I have a laser appointment. It’s a week early but things are going so well I don’t mind. I actually thought of having it done on my legs. Now, before you all scream — my legs are no longer hairy, and the hair that is there is very spotty. I shaved them about 2 years ago (after not doing them for 12+ years) thinking the hair would grow in properly, but it doesn’t. It has rubbed off from sleeping I guess. But, don’t panic, as I’m not having it done for a variety of reasons, including the cost, the pain and the fact very few people really look at my legs. People look at them as they’re so muscular but no one gets close enough to see the hair.

I’d never, ever considering doing my underarms, as I love the hair that is there. I like to play with it when I lie down and watch TV — ok, so not that often — but I just like it, and have no plans to ever, ever remove it. It’s been about 15 or 16 years since I’ve shaved them, too.

Eddie mentioned that I seem more outgoing since I’m going out more, but it’s just that the laser has given me more confidence. I’m still very shy, but I now have more balls than ever. I have no qualms about going up to a stranger and asking about their car or truck. Oh, I’m still very self conscious, and I don’t think that will ever go away, but it’s not so prevalent any more. I think the combination of the red hair and better cut gave me more confidence, and it’s not bright red like Lucy lol, it’s more a brunette with very warm highlights. The cut suits me much better and with that and the laser, I feel like a new woman.

I used to be extremely self-conscious over my weight, and still am somewhat that way, but after my ex said something really really REALLY nasty about my weight last year, I was triply self-conscious about my weight. Now I’m happy with me!

Stay warm and dry!

I’m frisky today, let me tell you! I was winding down the night and then someone had to tell me how he’s growing a goatee … so now my mind is really wandering! Got a nice new toy, too …. the material feels like the real thing and is just so damned sensual. You’ll see it soon on my sex toy review site.

Ok, enough or I won’t have 2 hands to type!

My predictions for the final 4 on So You Think You Can Dance: Benji and Travis for the men, Natalie and Donyelle for the women. Top 2? Benji and Donyelle, who were the best couple of the season.

Tropical storm coming to this area in a day or so …. gotta get some serious shopping done tomorrow.

Why are we attracted to specific characteristics in the opposite (or same) sex? I was at the Toyota dealership yesterday, waiting, and a man came in. At a quick glance I’d say he was 6′2″ or so, but I never really checked out his body. I saw his goatee, a gorgeous thick goatee, and was hooked. He also hadn’t shaved the rest of his face in 2/3 days, so had the George Michael look going on. I was utterly fascinated and a little turned on.

I recently received a photo of someone, and he had a beard, one of those 7-beards that’s not really bushy but not George Michael either — in between. That, jeans and a ballcap and I was hooked. That’s EXACTLY the look that turns me on.

Why?

I’ve never been one to fall for looks, and good looking men intimidate the hell out of me, and I never judge anyone on looks. But — why do dark-haired men attract me, why does that George Michael look make me nuts, why do goatees trip my trigger?

I’ve never analyzed why certain things turn me on, as I’m afraid what I may find out about myself.

But — do you ever wonder “why”? Why you like redheads? Why you like bigger breasts? Bigger butts? Hairy bushes? Hairy pits? etc etc etc?

To me — YES! See, I mentioned readynwilling, and someone emailed to ask me how I could have cyber sex with him if I was interested in Bushguy. Uhhh, I didn’t have cybersex with readynwilling. I flirted heavily with him, big difference. We weren’t private, it was in an open chat room. For all I know, Bushguy could have been there under another name! I’m a natural flirt, and online or on the phone, it really comes out. Man or woman, doesn’t matter! Readynwilling is great to tease, because we’re on the same wavelength sexually and we feed off each other. And, hell, he makes me feel good when he tells me how sexy I am, or that I’m a dream woman.

But, I’d never go and have a private chat with him, and I don’t cyber. To me, cybersex IS cheating. If you’re in a relationship, you should not have to have cybersex with someone. If you can’t share your fantasies with your partner, something is wrong. Now, let’s say Bushguy and I get together, and he’s not into something I fantasize about — would I then try to find someone on line to cyber with for satisfaction? Hell no!

I strongly believe in monogamy, and while our ex-President may have said a blowjob isn’t sex, I disagree.

So, is cybersex cheating, to you?

*brrrr* It’s about 26 degrees out and damn, I’m cold inside, too! Slept so-so, wish I could sleep for 8 hours without interruption for a change.

Still craving Chinese food but am not sure if I’m going to get any.

SO, what is the one thing a hair lover can say to a hairy woman to make her melt? “I want to get to know you, the cool person, not the hairy woman. The hair isn’t important”.

Ladies, wouldn’t that just make you melt? It did to me! Takes away 80% of the worry that you’re too hairy, or not hairy enough, etc.

Each day I realize more and more how much of a romantic I am, I put a romantic spin on everything. I see snow and think of sharing it with someone special, of cuddling up and watching it fall down. I see rain and think of walking in the rain, holding hands, sharing wet kisses. Last night in the chat room some guy was talking about wanting a casual fuck, and all I could say was, “gee, all I want is a hug”. I then told him I could easily find someone to fuck me, but I wanted more, I wanted all the bells and whistles. One woman understood what I was saying — I want the feelings, the emotion, the kissing, the touching, the cuddling, the foreplay, etc. Otherwise I may as well just use a toy, it’s the same empty feeling when you’re done.

I know, I know, this attitude isn’t getting me any, but I’d really rather just do myself than have some meaningless sex. Maybe if I were a guy I’d feel different, or maybe if I was horny as I was in my early 30’s (still didn’t get any) but now? Now I want it all and I won’t settle for less

I describe myself as a romantic sap. To me, one of the greatest pleasures in life is touching another human being. I’m a toucher with no one to touch. I notice that when I talk to men, if I’m close, I touch. My computer guy sites here and I’ll put my hand on his arm and the temptation to touch his shoulder, or back, is great. When I met Brian, and was absolutely scared to death, my hands were like ice, which was the only giveaway to him how nervous I was. He hend my hands to warm them up and that was more of an aphrodisiac than anything else could have been.

I was telling David today how I crave the need to cuddle. It’s pretty embarassing to admit, but when most of my friends just want to meet a guy and have sex, I want all the preliminaries and would be happy with that. Years ago someone told me to find someone blind, who would not care I was not attractive, heavy, and so hairy. Now, at times, I think I need someone impotent, who would be happy just being touched and cuddled all the time.

Oh sure, the “walking on the beach holding hands” thing is wonderful. The beach is my salvation, breathing the salt air calms my soul like nothing else. But, lately, it’s also causing me a lot of pain, because I’d like to have someone with me when I walk on the beach in the winter. The last time I did that was with Phil, my last ‘real’ relationship, and that was back in …. yeah, let’s not count that high, shall we?

Something tells me David is the man who could make all my dreams come true, but of course, he’s 1,300 miles from me and I believe he’s already involved with someone. He’s not a hair lover, but I also feel he would just accept the hair as it’s part of me. That’s fine — hair lovers scare me to a point, as I’ve said before.

So, here I am, feeling very romantic, wanting nothing more than to sit on the couch and look at the new paint in my living room, the new courtains, and cuddle up with someone special on that couch.

Instead, I’m going back to work, and have cranked up my Nickelback CD, The Long Road. Maybe later I’ll tell you about my obsession with Chad Kroeger!

Life ain’t fair, ya know?